Imagine a wedding day with no rules, no expectations—just you two celebrating your love without outside opinions. Sounds like a dream, right? Well, I can tell you firsthand—it’s even better than you imagine (because I did it myself!). Looking back, I still can’t believe we actually went for it, but here we are, and I have some thoughts to share.
Eloping is such a beautiful way to get married your way. No pressure, no strings attached—just the two of you creating a day that feels right. If you’re new to the idea, an elopement is simply an intimate celebration of your love. It can be anything you want it to be—whether that’s exchanging vows on a mountaintop, in your dream destination, or even in your own backyard. It’s about choosing a wedding that reflects you—whether that includes a few close loved ones or just the two of you.
When I say there are no rules, I mean it. So many couples feel like they have to follow certain traditions, but the truth is—you don’t. You can include everything, strip it down to the essentials, or create something entirely unique.
My husband and I eloped in Big Sur, and it was hands down the best decision we’ve ever made. It wasn’t easy at first—ditching my whole Pinterest board and stepping away from the idea of a big wedding felt huge. But now? We’d do it again in a heartbeat. The experience was everything—if I could relive it ten times over, I would.
One of the coolest things about eloping? You can do it anywhere. But instead of picking a spot just because it looks amazing in photos, choose a place where you can truly picture yourselves saying I do. Even better—pick a location that holds personal meaning. It adds a whole other layer to your day, and trust me, it shows in your photos.
I was obsessed with the idea of eloping in Yosemite—until I remembered that my husband and I are not the hiking type. The thought of us in hiking boots with tiny “we eloped” backpacks? Hilarious, but so not our vibe. I saw it on Pinterest and thought, Yep, that’s the place!—when in reality, it wasn’t even close. Take Pinterest with a grain of salt and choose a location that actually fits you. When we picked a place that meant something to us, everything changed. Looking back at our photos and video, it all feels so much more authentic than Yosemite ever would have.
Wherever you decide to elope, I’ll be there—passport and camera in hand! As a destination elopement photographer, I love helping couples plan epic experiences in incredible places.
I may be based on the East Coast as a Virginia elopement photographer, but I’m always ready to travel. So if you’re dreaming of eloping in Oregon, Hawaii, or Italy… I know someone who can help. 😉 First things first—start jotting down locations that truly speak to you both. Once we lock that in, the adventure begins!
Once you’ve locked in the perfect elopement location, it’s time to find a place to stay—and trust me, Airbnbs are the way to go. Look for a spot with amazing natural light where you can get ready, relax, and actually enjoy the experience. Think big windows, skylights, and modern decor.
Pro tip: Dark cabins with orange-tinted lighting can add unwanted warmth to skin tones, making them tricky to edit. If you want the best photos, choose a place flooded with natural light!
Not sure which Airbnb to pick? Send a few links to your photographer—they’ll help you find the best option. But if your heart is set on a rustic or moodier space, let them know in advance. A good photographer can work with any lighting situation—whether that means leaning into dark, dramatic tones, using flash, adjusting white balance, or even shooting some black-and-white images for a timeless feel.
At the end of the day, your vision comes first. Just keep the conversation open with your photographer and videographer so they can make magic happen!
Your officiant plays a huge role in your elopement, so take the time to find someone you genuinely connect with and enjoy being around. My husband and I had no clue how to find one and, honestly, felt a little intimidated by the whole process.
Turns out, it was ridiculously easy. A quick Google search, and boom—Brian popped up as a Big Sur officiant!
Brian Borgia, our officiant, was not only amazing but also super knowledgeable about the legal side of things (like permits!), which was a huge help. Most officiants charge between $200–$500, but pricing can vary.
If you’re searching for one, start with Google and check out reviews. You can also ask a pastor or even a close friend to officiate if they’re legally able. Either way, pick someone who makes your day feel even more special!
One of the best things about eloping is that there’s no right or wrong way to do it. You can invite family and close friends or keep it just the two of you—whatever feels right.
My husband and I chose to elope just us, and it was the most romantic, relaxed, and stress-free day ever. No micromanaging, no pressure, just us fully soaking in the moment. We even said our private vows after our photographer/videographer left because we wanted that moment to be completely ours (also, hearing our voices on video? No thanks—major cringe! 😂).
A lot of people ask if we live-streamed our ceremony for family, and the answer is no. Deciding to keep it just us was tough at first—we had moments of feeling selfish. Those feelings are real. You love your family, but at the end of the day, this is about your love. Period.
As a lifelong people-pleaser, I felt the pressure to have the colors my sisters wanted, the big wedding my mom dreamed of… but deep down, I wasn’t happy. Some of my family wasn’t thrilled when we announced our elopement, but over time, they came around and now couldn’t be happier for us. I know not everyone gets that happy ending right away, and if that’s you, just know—it’s normal to feel that initial “meh” moment, but you’ll get through it.
Eloping is all about give and take. If it’s just you two, you might miss having your mom zip up your dress. If you invite family, you might give up that quiet, private morning together. Neither choice is wrong. But if you feel a little sad about one of the trade-offs, that doesn’t mean you made the wrong decision—just that it was a big one. And that’s okay.
Gorgeous photos are a given (of course!), but your photographer is so much more than just the person behind the camera. You’ll be spending a big part of your elopement day together, so finding someone whose energy feels right is just as important as loving their work.
That’s why I always recommend a quick FaceTime or phone call before booking. A 15-minute chat can tell you so much about someone’s vibe—it’s the easiest way to make sure we click. And don’t worry if calls aren’t your thing; I love me some voice memos. The main goal? Making sure you feel good energy from the start.
Your photographer is likely one of the first vendors you’ll book, so don’t choose based on photos alone. Stunning images matter, but an amazing connection? That’s what will make it.
Just because you’re skipping the big wedding doesn’t mean you have to miss out on the details.
Ring boxes, perfume, custom hangers, wedding stationery—bring it all. Your Airbnb is your space, and you can personalize it however you like. And if you’re not sending wedding invites, you can still print wedding announcements as a keepsake. My husband and I had ours done by Lindsey, the owner of Truth Papers, and she did an amazing job. We wanted something simple to send to family but also something beautiful to hold onto.
Pro Tip: Ask your stationery designer to make a version that says “We Eloped” instead of “We’re Eloping” for your photographer. Also, if you’re using custom stamps, make sure to check the postage requirements. We didn’t realize we needed extra and had to add rabbit stamps to all of ours at the post office.
These little details not only make for beautiful flat lays in your wedding gallery but also give you keepsakes to cherish forever. If you want to go all in, you absolutely should. I packed framed photos of us to hang around our Airbnb to make it feel more personal and less like a rental.
You don’t have to have a big wedding to have all the meaningful details. If it’s important to you, include it.
One of the best things about eloping is that it can double as both your wedding and honeymoon.
Since you’re already in your dream destination, why not extend the trip by a few days or even a week? We stayed just under a week and had our honeymoon in Carmel-by-the-Sea. If you ever get the chance to visit, do it. We highly recommend Roy’s at Pebble Beach for an amazing dining experience.
It was so special to wind down in the same place we eloped. The little inn we stayed at put together picnic baskets, so we went back to our ceremony spot for a picnic. It was the perfect full-circle moment—something we wouldn’t have been able to do if we had a traditional venue wedding.
If you’re eloping somewhere incredible, consider making it your honeymoon too. It’s an easy way to make the experience even more meaningful.
Let’s talk logistics! I get tons of questions about eloping, so I’ve put together some of the most frequently asked ones to help you out. If you have any other questions, don’t hesitate to reach out—I’m always just a message away on Instagram or an email away at steph@stephaniemariephoto.com!
I hear this all the time—”I want to elope, but I don’t want to upset my parents.” I completely get it. But please know that choosing to celebrate your love in your own way isn’t selfish. There are so many ways to include your family, even if they’re not physically there, like having them write letters for you to read on the day or throwing a big celebration when you get back.
For us, we wanted to make our moms feel special, so we sent them ‘Mom of the Bride’ and ‘Mom of the Groom’ candles to light during our ceremony. They absolutely loved it, and it was such a simple but meaningful way to involve them. If you love that idea, here’s where we got ours!
One thing that really helped? My husband and I booked everything—flights, photographer, Airbnb—before we told a single soul. That way, when we did share the news, we were already fully committed and excited. And yes, I still second-guessed myself once we told our family—that’s totally normal. But at the end of the day, we knew we were making the right choice for us.
Good news! While elopements are much simpler to plan than traditional weddings, staying organized is still key. My husband and I created a spreadsheet to track everything—flights, car rentals, marriage licenses, and more—and it made the whole process so much easier. Seeing everything laid out helped us feel less overwhelmed and more in control.
So where do you start? First, get all your ideas down on paper. Then, focus on location first—everything else will fall into place from there. Take it one step at a time. The big things to book first? Location, photographer, videographer, makeup artist, and flights. Once those are locked in, everything else starts to come together.
Your photographer can also be a huge help in the planning process, especially if they specialize in elopements. I know for me, I love being right there with my couples, helping every step of the way. So always check in with your photographer—they’ve got your back!
As long as you follow the marriage requirements in the state where you elope, then yes, it’s legally binding. That said, you don’t have to make it legal if you don’t want to—I’ve had couples who were already married but wanted to have a fun elopement or vow renewal. No rules, just what feels right for you!
Once you book your officiant, they can guide you through the exact paperwork and steps you need to take. Brian, who I linked above, was amazing—he made sure we knew exactly what to do, and everything went smoothly!
This may vary depending on where you elope, but in most states, yes—you’ll need one or two witnesses. A quick Google search will help you confirm the exact requirements for your location.
Your photographer can count as a witness, and you can ask literally anyone nearby. A random hiker? Totally works. For my husband and me, our videographer was our witness and signed our legal papers. Simple, stress-free, and done!
This part is simple: you’ll typically need your state ID or passport and your marriage license paperwork. If you’ve been married before, you may also need documentation proving that your previous marriage has been legally dissolved.
One of the best things about eloping is that you control your budget. Whether it’s a simple weekend getaway with a sunrise beach ceremony or an all-out experience with a private chef in Vancouver, you can spend as much or as little as you want. A good starting point for budgeting is around $7-10,000 but it also depends on so many factors.
For full transparency, Cameron and I planned for about $10,000, including our honeymoon, and we stayed right on track. We got to do everything on our list, from a private sailboat to amazing dinners.
I highly recommend making a honeymoon list first—write down all the experiences you want and estimate the costs. Plan out the fun, then set your budget. One of the biggest perks of eloping is that it frees up more room for those honeymoon experiences. Make it something exciting, not stressful. Start researching and dreaming it all up! And if you need recommendations in the Carmel-by-the-Sea area, you know where to find me.
Timelines can feel overwhelming, but they’re essential for making sure your day runs smoothly. You might have no idea how much time to set aside for getting ready photos, private vows, the ceremony, or even a mid-day coffee run. That’s where your photographer comes in—they should guide you on the best timing for everything.
All of my packages include Timeline Guidance to help you create the perfect flow for your day. After a quick questionnaire, I’ll map out a custom timeline tailored to your elopement. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach—elopements typically range from 5-6 hours but can be much longer depending on what you want to be covered and where we’re going. Your photographer (aka me!) will be there to help structure the best timeline possible.
For reference, here’s how my husband and I’s elopement timeline looked—yours can be completely different, but this gives you an idea:
3:50 PM – Photographer arrives to begin capturing the day.
4:00 PM – Detail shots of rings, attire, and special mementos.
4:30 PM – Cameron’s getting ready moments, final touches, and candid shots.
4:40 PM – Cameron reads Stephanie’s heartfelt letter.
4:45 PM – Stephanie’s getting ready, surrounded by love and excitement.
5:00 PM – Stephanie reads Cameron’s letter, a quiet and emotional moment.
5:15 PM – A special FaceTime with family to share the anticipation.
5:30 PM – Depart for Big Sur, a scenic 30-minute drive to the ceremony.
6:30 PM – The ceremony begins, an intimate and breathtaking exchange of vows.
6:50 PM – Romantic bridal portraits capturing the golden-hour glow.
7:45 PM – Vendors depart following a private vow exchange, concluding the evening.
Our elopement was everything we wanted, and I can’t wait for you to plan something just as special. As you’ve seen, elopements are no longer viewed negatively—they’re one of the most authentic ways to celebrate your love, and more couples are embracing them than ever.
I would be honored to be your elopement photographer and help bring your vision to life. Let’s dream up your perfect day together and make it even better than you imagined. Don’t hesitate to reach out—let’s make it happen!
Planning your dream elopement should be just as magical as the day itself, and finding the right photographer is key. If you think we’d be a great fit, let’s chat! I’d love to hear all about your vision and help you make it a reality. I’m not just your photographer—I’m your friend, here to support you every step of the way and make sure your day is nothing short of perfect.
This is your day, and I’m here to make sure it’s everything you’ve ever dreamed of—stress-free, fun, and full of the best memories. Ready to make it happen? Fill out the form below, and let’s get the ball rolling!
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