My husband and I decided to elope in Big Sur, California, and let me just say—there are quite a few things I wish I knew before making that decision.

Table of Contents

Your Family Might Not Be Happy—And That’s Okay
It Might Be More Emotional Than You Expect
Your Dress (and Shoes!) Will Get WAY Dirtier Than You Think
Give Yourself More Time Than You Think You Need
Don’t Sleep on iPhone & Polaroid Photos
Book the Makeup Artist—You’ll Thank Me Later
The Vendors You Choose Will Make or Break Your Experience
Have a Backup Plan (Just in Case!)
Your Elopement Video Will Be Your New Favorite Keepsake
How Much We Wouldn’t Regret It

I want to lay it all out for you—the good, the bad, and the unexpected—because eloping isn’t just about skipping a big wedding; it’s about making a deeply personal choice that will shape your wedding experience forever.

How it all started

Believe it or not, eloping wasn’t always the plan. We had the venue, the wedding colors, and the vision for a traditional wedding. And would you believe me if I said the final straw was… a text thread about my sisters refusing to wear a certain color? Yep. That’s what sent me over the edge.

I remember sitting there, frustrated, when my husband (of all people!) casually said, “Why don’t we just elope?” I stared at him. YOU want to elope? I never would have expected that. But that one conversation changed everything, and from there, we started planning our intimate elopement on the California coast.

Now that a few years have passed, I’ve had time to reflect on the experience. Here are 10 things I wish I knew before deciding to elope—things that might help you if you’re considering taking the leap.

Your Family Might Not Be Happy—And That’s Okay

The number one concern I hear from so many couples thinking about eloping?

“What is my mother-in-law going to think about this whole eloping thing?” Totally normal feeling.

And honestly? I hate to say it—but there’s not really a way around it. At some point, you just have to do it… and accept that a few people might get upset along the way. My husband and I were (or should I say were) the biggest people-pleasers in the world. Choosing to elope tested every part of that. Even though we cared deeply about keeping the peace, we knew this was a once-in-a-lifetime kind of day. And that mattered more.

Here’s the crazy thing: I thought I knew exactly who would be supportive and who wouldn’t.

I was completely wrong. Some people I expected to be excited were upset. Others I thought might push back actually encouraged us. Did it cause tension? Yes. Did a few relationships take time to heal? Also yes. Thats just the real part of it.

But at the end of the day, eloping is about you and your partner—not anyone else. It takes real courage to go against tradition, but if this feels right to you, trust that the people who truly love you will come around.

Quick storytime: A couple of years ago, I had a couple book their dream elopement. We planned everything out. But when it came down to the wire, opinions from family got in their heads, and they ended up switching to what others wanted. To this day, they regret it.They made the day about everyone else… and not themselves. Don’t let that be you.

It Might Be More Emotional Than You Expect

Eloping isn’t just about simplifying wedding plans—it’s about creating a deeply personal experience. What I didn’t anticipate was how emotional and healing the experience would be.

We chose to elope on the California coast, which held deep meaning for me. My dad had passed away in a plane accident near the ocean, and when my husband proposed, he did so near the water as a tribute. Choosing to elope in Big Sur was a way to honor my past while stepping into my future, and it was incredibly powerful.

Cameron also found a way to carry a piece of his grandpa with him—he wore his grandpa’s pin, a quiet tribute to someone who had been a guiding force in his life and has since passed.

So if you’re choosing an elopement location, don’t just go for something that looks pretty on Instagram. Ask yourself:

Does this place hold meaning for us?
Will it add depth to our story?
How do we want to feel when we look back at these photos?

At first, we considered Yosemite for our elopement—just because it sounded fun. But after reflecting, we realized the California coast made so much more sense for us personally.

Your Dress (and Shoes!) Will Get WAY Dirtier Than You Think

This one is kind of funny, but I don’t think I realized just how dirty my dress and shoes would get. The California coast isn’t exactly known for thick mud, so I didn’t think twice about it. But where we eloped in Big Sur? That black sand was ruthless.

Honestly, I didn’t care about my dress getting dirty—I actually loved it. It felt like a badge of honor, proof of the adventure. But my shoes? That’s where I was lowkey kinda bummed. I spent a good amount on them, and I really wanted to wear them down to our first look. Holy cow, though—that dirt ate those shoes alive.

I thought about sending them in to get cleaned, but the more I look at them, the more I love how they tell the story of our day. So maybe it’s a good thing I didn’t know beforehand—because now, every speck of dirt just reminds me of one of the best days of my life.

Pro Tip: If you’re wearing shoes you love, maybe bring a backup pair for the adventure part. Or just embrace the mess—because sometimes, the dirtier the dress, the better the story.

Give Yourself More Time Than You Think You Need

I seriously should have put this as number one because this is probably the biggest thing I wish I knew. And you’d think I would have—being a photographer and all! But for some reason, I just assumed I’d have everything perfectly lined up that morning. Spoiler: I did not.

The morning of your elopement is so sacred and special. I got to FaceTime my family, take fun videos and selfies, and soak in the moment—but it felt like I had maybe 10 minutes to do all of it. When you elope, you’re chasing the sun—and trust me, it waits for no one. I had technically built in enough time, but looking back, I wish I had an extra hour or two just to breathe and be present.

Even if you’re someone who thrives on a little chaos, do yourself a favor and add more time than you think you need. Worst case? You get a peaceful morning to relax, enjoy the moment, and let it all sink in before the adventure begins.

Don’t Sleep on iPhone & Polaroid Photos

Speaking of time—I wish I had taken more iPhone and Polaroid photos. Don’t get me wrong, the professional photos are absolutely stunning, but there’s just something about those raw, unfiltered shots. They’re imperfect, candid, and straight out of the moment, which makes them feel so special.

Looking back, I wish I had more time at our Airbnb just to snap more Polaroids and casual iPhone pics. That’s why, for my clients, I always take a ton of iPhone shots alongside their professional gallery—because sometimes, the unedited, in-the-moment photos end up being the ones you cherish most.

If you want to capture those nostalgic, film-like memories, I highly recommend bringing a Polaroid or a disposable film camera. Here are some of my favorites:

Fujifilm Instax Square SQ1 Instant Camera
Fujifilm Instax Wide 400 Instant Camera (Personal Favorite)
Fujifilm Instax Mini Evo Instant Camera

Book the Makeup Artist—You’ll Thank Me Later

I almost didn’t do this one, but three days before my elopement, I panicked and booked a professional hair and makeup artist. And let me tell you—I have zero regrets.

I get it. When you elope, you’re prioritizing where your money goes. The biggest investments are usually your photographer and your dress, so hair and makeup might feel like a maybe rather than a must. That’s exactly how I felt… until I pictured myself struggling with mascara clumps on the morning of my elopement. That was not the energy I wanted on such a special day.

I wanted to feel confident, beautiful, and—most importantly—not stressed. I didn’t want a full glam look, just a refined, natural version of myself. So, even though I booked hair and makeup ridiculously last minute, it ended up being one of the best decisions I made. I felt pampered, relaxed, and honestly the most beautiful I’ve ever felt.

The Vendors You Choose Will Make or Break Your Experience

Here comes some realness—if I could go back, there are definitely some vendors I would’ve chosen differently. When you’re eloping, the vendors you hire aren’t just service providers—they’re your entire support system. You don’t have a huge wedding party or hundreds of guests to distract you from a bad experience, so it’s crucial to choose people who make your day feel special, not stressful.

Get on the phone with them. Voice memo back and forth. You don’t necessarily need a full consultation, but you’ll know pretty quickly if the energy flows. Trust that gut feeling. Even if a vendor does amazing work, if the experience with them is awkward, frustrating, or just off, you’ll feel that every time you look at your photos or think back on your day.

This is especially true for your elopement photographer. Of course, their work needs to be incredible, but your photographer is with you for some of the most intimate moments of your elopement day. If you don’t feel comfortable with them, it’s going to show in your photos. Choose vendors who feel like a great fit—not just ones with a pretty portfolio. This one is big.

Have a Backup Plan (Just in Case!)

If you’re the type of person who likes a little structure, having a backup plan will be your best friend. Elopements are all about embracing the unexpected, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have a plan in place—just in case.

Take it from me: I like to think I’m reasonably in control of things, yet somehow, I didn’t have a Plan B when Big Sur decided to throw the biggest fog party I’ve ever seen. I’m talking couldn’t see my own hand in front of my face levels of fog. But because we had chosen the California coast as a tribute to my dad, I was committed to waiting it out—whether that meant eloping in daylight or in total darkness.

We drove up and down the coast for what felt like forever—probably 30-40 minutes—until, just as the last bit of light was slipping away, the fog started lifting. Out of nowhere, a little stretch of coastline appeared, and it was like something out of a movie.

Now, we got lucky, but if your elopement day throws a curveball—like downpouring rain or unexpected closures—having a plan can help ease the stress. Maybe that means packing clear umbrellas if you’re not down to get drenched, or researching alternate spots in case your location gets hit with bad weather. If you’re eloping somewhere with limited cell service, make sure you know what to expect. The more you prepare, the more you can relax and go with the flow—even when Mother Nature has other plans.

Your Elopement Video Will Be Your New Favorite Keepsake

One thing I did not expect was just how much I was going to love our elopement video. I mean, I knew I’d love our photos—that was a given. But video? I wasn’t totally sold at first.

I almost didn’t book a videographer because, like a lot of couples (and a photographer myself), I figured photos were the priority and video was more of a nice-to-have. But let me tell you—watching our elopement video for the first time completely changed my perspective. There’s just something about being able to press play and instantly feel like you’re right back in that moment. I can’t wait for the day we get to sit down with our future kids and relive it all over again.

Flipping through a gallery is amazing in its own right, but video captures the movement, the sounds, the energy—the things photos can’t. If you’re on the fence, let this be your sign.

How Much We Wouldn’t Regret It

I have to end with this: I wish I knew how much we wouldn’t regret our decision to elope. When we told our family we were eloping, we got hit with all kinds of opinions and words that planted seeds of doubt. Looking back, I can confidently say—not a single regret.

We made the day all about us. We didn’t invite anyone—not because we didn’t want them there, but because it was about what we wanted. We didn’t want to focus on anyone else’s feelings or expectations, and that was such a freeing decision. If you’re feeling torn, like you want to elope but aren’t sure about the location or are worried about family reactions, I’m here for you. You’ve got me in your corner, and I’m totally an open book.

In the end, we all have one life to live, and I’ll be darned if I let anyone else stand in the way of what my husband and I wanted for our special day. So trust your gut, and remember—it’s your day, your decision. You won’t regret it.

Your Golden Elopement Package – Most Popular! Your All-In-One U.S. Elopement Package

Planning your dream elopement should be just as magical as the day itself, and finding the right photographer is key. If you think we’d be a great fit, let’s chat! I’d love to hear all about your vision and help you make it a reality. I’m not just your photographer—I’m your friend, here to support you every step of the way and make sure your day is nothing short of perfect.

• Up to 6 hours of coverage – I’ll be there to capture every single moment, from start to finish.
  
• Preview Gallery – You won’t have to wait long to see your photos! I’ll send you a sneak peek within 1-2 weeks so you can start reliving the magic right away.
  
• 60-page hardcover guide – Packed with all the tips and advice you need to make your elopement as smooth and stress-free as possible.
  
• Custom timeline planning – I’ll help you map out the perfect day so everything flows effortlessly.
  
• High & low-resolution images – You’ll get images in all sizes, so you can print and share them as much as you want.
  
• 8×8 prints of your favorite images – A sweet little surprise sent to your door to keep forever.
  
• All photos on a glass USB – Your memories, wrapped up in a timeless keepsake.
  
• All travel included – I’m available to capture your elopement anywhere in the U.S!